Our "Monday Morning Ed-U-Upper" has become
the most widely read e-mail periodical directed to educators.
It's free and goes all over the world every Monday
morning. You will find it short, filled with humor, quotes, motivational
pieces, fresh ideas, and bits of this and that.
We hope you'll try it. It's easy to get on, and very
easy to get off.
Best of the Bunch... Vol. I Desk Signs
Note: Depending on the fonts installed
on your computer, and the way your computer browser is set up, these
desk signs may not display properly.
(Ask for a free 10-pack sample the
next time you place an order. Then you'll be able to see the quality,
and the pure fun, of these "Desk Signs.")
IT'S NICE TO BE IMPORTANT...
But more important to be nice!
THERE IS NOTHING
SO SMALL...
That it can't be blown way out of proportion!
THE ONLY TIME A WOMAN
CAN CHANGE
A MAN...
Is when he's a baby!
DON'T ANNOY THE CRAZY PERSON STARING
AT THE
COMPUTER...
$5.00 FINE FOR WHINING
YOU MAY BE ONLY ONE
PERSON IN THE WORLD...
But you may be the world to one person!
THE WORLD'S MOST WIDELY
USED COMPUTER
LANGUAGE...
"@!@!*!*#?!!*!#@!"
I DO NOT REPEAT GOSSIP...
So listen carefully!
"OUTSIDE OF A DOG...
A book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog,
it's too dark to read!"
...Groucho
Marx
WHAT IF THE HOKEY-POKEY IS REALLY WHAT
IT'S ALL ABOUT?
RELAX AND TAKE HEART...
The only person who ever got all the work
done by Friday was Robinson Crusoe!
THIS ONLY LOOKS
LIKE A DESK...
It's actually a large trash can
with
drawers
and four legs!
BE MODERATE IN
ALL THINGS...
Especially moderation!
I'D LIKE TO HELP YOU OUT...
Which way did you come in?
YOU HAVE NOT LIVED...
Until you have done something for someone
who
can never repay you!
THE BUCK DOESN'T EVEN SLOW DOWN HERE!
MAY THIS HOUSE ALWAYS BE...
Too small to hold all our friends!
NEVER TRY TO TEACH
A PIG TO SING...
It wastes your time, and it annoys the pig!
A WOMAN...
Has to do twice as much as a man
to be considered
half as good.
Fortunately, this isn't difficult!
ALL I ASK FOR...
Is the chance to prove that money
cannot
buy
happiness!
A LITTLE GRAY HAIR...
A small price to pay for wisdom!
NOT GETTING WHAT
YOU WANT...
Is sometimes a remarkable stroke of luck!
I WELCOME YOUR ADVICE
AND CRITICISM...
And always rush them through the proper
channels!
(one flush usually does it!)
RICHER THAN ME
YOU WILL NEVER BE...
I had a mother who read to me!
THERE IS MORE TO LIFE...
Than increasing its speed!
EVERYONE BRINGS ME
HAPPINESS...
Some by arriving. Some by leaving!
IF THEY CAN PUT ONE MAN
ON THE MOON...
Why not all of them!
THERE ARE THREE KINDS OF
PEOPLE IN THE
WORLD...
Those who can count, and those who can't!
NEVER UNDERESTIMATE...
The power of stupid people in large groups!
THE MOST IMPORTANT
THINGS IN LIFE...
Aren't really things at all.
ALL MEN ARE ANIMALS...
Some just make better pets!
TREAT EACH DAY AS
YOUR LAST...
Someday you'll be right!
NO ONE SHOULD BE CONSIDERED
COMPLETELY USELESS...
At the very least, they can serve as a bad example!
A GOOD EXERCISE FOR
THE HEART...
Is to bend down and help another up!
REACH FOR THE SKY...
Even if you happen to miss,
you'll still be among
the stars!
SORRY, I CAN'T DEAL WITH
ANY CRISIS
TODAY...
My schedule is already full.
HAVE A NICE DAY...
(Unless, of course, you've already made other
plans.)
TODAY IS A GIFT...
That's why it is called the present!
IF YOU ARE GROUCHY, IRRITABLE,
OR JUST
PLAIN MEAN...
There will be a $10.00 charge for putting up
with you!
THE
FOUR STAGES OF LIFE...
#1...
#2...
#3...
#4...
You believe in Santa
Claus
You don't believe in Santa Claus
You become Santa Claus
You start to look like Santa Claus
Keep in mind, computer-generated
images don't come close to matching the quality and impact of these
3.5" x 2" Desk Signs sitting in a business-card sized holder
on your desk.
Paperbacks For Educators
426 West Front St.
Washington, Missouri 63090 800-227-2591; Fax 800-514-7323 paperbacks@usmo.com
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